Kept by God Psalm 37:5-6 - Personal Blog of Trisha Rapley, Australian Author.

And somehow, like no one before, he found his way into my thoughts without asking, without force, without intention.

He slipped quietly into the way I walked through my days, into the pauses between breaths, into the moments where I once stood alone with myself. He was there in the soft routines, in the way my heart leaned forward when hope stirred, in the silence where longing speaks without language.

He became part of me in places I didn’t know could be shared, a corner of my heart I never knew existed, let alone had room for another soul.

Not claimed.

Not possessed.

Just present.

And yet, above all of this, above desire, above wonder, above the quiet ache of wanting, he lived in my prayers.

That is where I held him most carefully.

I prayed not to bind him to me, not to keep him for my own comfort, not to shape him into something that would stay. I prayed to protect him. To guard his heart from what would drain him, to deliver him from anything that was not meant for him, even if that thing was me.

I asked God to place His will so deeply within him that nothing false could take root. That no distraction, no fear, no unhealed place would find space to grow. I wanted God’s purity to dwell in him so fully that only truth could survive there.

I wanted everything good for him. And I wanted him too.

That was the tension, holy and human, desire wrapped in surrender, love learning how to kneel. I did not ask God to give him to me. I asked God to have him. Because if God held him first, then whatever unfolded would be sacred, whether it stayed or passed through my life like a blessing that teaches and leaves.

Loving him taught me a great deal about myself.

That real love does not rush to possess.

It waits.

It listens.

It prays.

It chooses reverence over urgency.

I learned that when someone enters your prayers, they have crossed a threshold deeper than touch, deeper than words, deeper than promise. They have been entrusted to God through your heart, and that is not small.

So, I hold him there still in the quiet space where God speaks louder than longing.

Where faith steadies the trembling want of my humanity.

Where love is not measured by outcome, but by obedience to what is pure.

If he is meant to walk beside me, then God will align our steps.

If he is meant to walk another road, then God will bless him there, too.

Either way, he has been loved rightly. And I have loved honestly. And that, I believe, is never wasted.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this:

He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.

Psalm 37:5-6

Lord,

I place him in your hands before I place him in my heart.

Guard him where I cannot. Heal what I cannot see. Lead him where only you know he must go.

If he is meant to be part of my story, let it be written with clarity, patience, and truth.

If he is not, remove what must be released with gentleness and grace.

Purify my love so it never competes with your will.

Teach my heart how to want without clinging, to hope without controlling, to love without fear.

I trust you with him. And I trust you with me.

Amen.

Kept by God Psalm 37:5-6 - Personal Blog of Trisha Rapley, Australian Author.

Kept by God Psalm 37:5-6 - Personal Blog of Trisha Rapley, Australian Author.